Freeconomy Blog
Sat
12 Sep
Life in an intentional community
Aside from living without money, I also live as part of an intentional community on the outskirts of Bristol in England. An intentional community, by the way, is a planned residential community designed to have a much greater degree of teamwork than in general society, where members hold a common social, political or spiritual vision, and where members generally share resources and responsibilities. In our community members can take part in community life to whatever extent they want to, but have their own individuality as well, something I believe to be crucial to health and happiness. This means that although everyone else here uses money - though not much - I can not use it and still take part in community life to some degree.
However, one of the ironies of my year without money is that a lot of the time I have to act individually - transport and cooking being two good examples. For instance, I only cook off-grid and they cook using bottled gas, which is technically off-grid but not something I am overly comfortable with given where it has come from and everything that happens along the way.Which means that whilst they are cooking communally together, I am off on my own cooking on the rocket stove.
As regards transport, I've on occasion cycled into Bristol even though there was someone driving to the same venue in a car at the exact same time.
Our collective mission is to become a Transition Farm, combining low impact living with high impact education and arts. It's a really inspiring bunch of people, including folk such as Deasy Bamford, founder of the fantastic Tribe of Doris festival and Denise Rowe, member of the internationally renowned band Baka Beyond. Contrary to how most people view these types of alternative societies, most people here have degrees in something or other, ranging from business and economics to education, from art to zoology.
Before we all joined this community, none of us had any real experience of community living. I'd lived in a fantastically inspiring Veganic (vegan and organic) community called 'Gentle World' in New Zealand for a while, a community founded by the aunt of actor Jaoquin Pheonix and his late brother River Pheonix. This community had a huge impact on my life. I seen a completely new, more sane and gentle way of doing things, something that in my heart and head I believed to be possible but up until then had never actually witnessed. It also had a massive influence on me in setting up the Freeconomy Community and I suppose that experience is continuing to influence my future plans.
But apart from my limited experience, no one else had really any experience of this way of life, and very few of the members even knew each other. Everyone came from the city where they lived in their own little individual boxes with little experience of living off the soil.
I didn't join the community until about 6mths after it began, so I missed the initial mayhem. Apparently people were getting irate, initially, because others didn't squeeze the toothpaste tube from the bottom. Cleaning standards always varied - those who wanted it squeeky clean pissed off those who didn't care as much, and those who didn't care as much pissed off those who wanted it squeeky clean. Those who didn't ever put the rubbish out annoyed those who felt they always did, and those who didn't ever put the rubbish out but who always done the food shopping got annoyed by those who never did the food shopping but who always put the rubbish out.
Communication between people wasn't great either - people often would bring their moods into the collective. Which is great in some respects, and very real, but it is amazing how one or two angry or vocally under-the weather people could bring everyone else's energy down too. Humans can be quite loose with their language sometimes and forget their impact on those receiving such loose and ill thought out comments.
No one had much experience of how to make decisions collectively when I got here, and we are probably only starting to get better at it now. We only began looking at consensus decision making (as opposed to democratic decision making) yesterday as a potential method of decision making in the future.
I'll be honest and say that living in a community isn't always easy, especially for those who live and commune indoors. Things can often get quite intense. Imagine if you went to work all day and at 6pm, when you grabbed your coat to head off home, everyone at your workplace came with you. It's something a bit like that; we live and work together. You see the same people at 7am that you do at 10pm many days. This is only slightly difficult for us to deal with because we all came from a society that teaches us to live individually in isolation from those around us, so we've all lost many of the skills we once took for granted when we lived communally.
But whilst it can be intense the odd time, it is also hugely rewarding and we've chosen this way of living for a reason. We are all rational beings, we're not interested in being less happy. In places like this we grow together, we get to see each other in our full realities, we look after each other as friends and not just work colleagues, and work and play somehow become one.
One of the challenges humanity faces in the future is to regain the ability to live communally again. In a post peak oil and climate changing world, we're all going to have get much better at sharing resources again, in a similar but probably more full on way than even Cuba experienced when the Soviet Union imploded in 1989, effectively cutting off the vast majority of Cuba's oil supply over night.
When you cook communally, for say 15 people, you use far less energy per person than if you were cooking for just yourself or a small family. If you turn a light on in a room it uses the same amount of energy regardless of whether there are 1 or 20 people in the room (in most houses people stay in their own rooms and therefore possibly use three or four times the amount of electricity). When you put on a woodburner, its the same heat regardless of how many are in the room; in fact, the more people there are the warmer it gets. If you drive to the shop to get the food shopping, one car going for 20 people is much more efficient that 5 cars going for 5 families of 4 people. The list goes on and on.
A huge part of our environemental crisis is that we all live so individually these days in little compartments in big impersonal towns and cities. Each street of 50 houses in the UK probably has at least 10 lawnmowers, when one would suffice. I decided to build the Toolshare part of the Freeconomy Community the day I realised this and the fact that I never heard two lawnmowers going at the same time. I'd also be surprised if two people were drilling a hole in their wall at the same time.
One of the ironies of life is that we've never been surrounded by so many humans in the history of this world, yet humans have never felt so alone. Because of all this, we all use about four to five times the amount of energy we would do if living communally. If we lived more communally we could reduce our energy consumption and carbon footrpint by about 80% without too much trouble.
Until we begin to live communally again - and in my ideal world without money as a substitute for trust in each other - then I really believe we will have little chance of averting the worst effects of climate change or reducing the rates of depression, suicide and crime, these indicators of unhappiness. Rates of crime, violence, loneliness etc are much higher in places where people are anonymous - like large towns and cities. In small communities members are much less likely to become aggressive people as there is much more love and nurturing of each other. I can't articulate this bit very well, it's more of a feeling, but something I have experienced, and having lived in both large cities and small communities I know which is the mentally and physically healthier place to live. In a small community you also cannot afford to act aggressively and disrespectfully or without care, because everyone knows you and what you do. Reputation, not notes and coins, becomes your currency.
Living in a community - especially an intentional community - brings up a lot of issues for people about themselves; I know it has for me and the members of the communities I have been in anyway. You get to learn a lot about yourself and some of this can be a painful process to go through. We all have our issues, they're just a bit different to everyone else's. But in a community you do start to deal with them and you come out the other side of the process as a far more developed human.
It has been a huge privilege to have done this with people here and I am becoming really close to them all. Its hard seeing people undertake actions which you don't fully agree with - in my case people drinking milk from Tesco, to take one example - but at least its real and through discussing it together a change of opinions (and eventually a change in actions) occur, sometimes on both sides of the debate.
I also hadn't realised until the last six months what a poor communicator I was (in the sense of not being able to talk about real feelings, or masking them as something else and then trying to manipulate and control people to do what I want them to do). Relative to the masses I'm probably not too lacking in this respect, but that's not because I do it well, just that in my experencemore the vast majority communicate terribly (and very manipulatively) in a lot of respects and on a number of levels. In this respect I've probably learned more in the last year than in my whole Iife prior I reckon.
Has anyone else here ever lived in a community of any sort? If so, where? Or do you know of any communities that are worth visiting, and why? Would you like to live in a community? Could you live in a community? What do you think would be the hardest part for you? And what part of it do you think you would love the most?
Great to be sharing the planet with you all.
THE FREECONOMY BLOG is written by Mark Boyle, founder of the Freeconomy Community.
Comment on this Post:
Meera comments ...
I would love to live in a community. Whenever I visit my relatives in the village, we do a lot of work together and nothing less than sheer fun! Somehow I become more energetic than usual and even more helpful. But all this happens only when I visit there for a few days or weeks, I don't know what would happen when I totally live there. I think the hardest part for me would be to tolerate people saying things against someone behind his/her back. That's something I can never stand. Other than that, I think I'll love every part of it, especially helping others. If my mother has taught me anything by her example, helping everyone with whatever I can and to whatever extent, has to be the first one. I am a bit reserved person (in the sense that partying out or having a great gossip is not my way), but I am an endless believer of friendship too. Surely it's alright for a community life?
LyssaM comments ...
I'm the same as Meera... would love to... and also the closest I've come to it is back home... I don't if it's the same where're you're from, Meera, but back home we have whole roads that are just of family... When we go to the village to visit our cousins we go to one house.. then the next.. then the next.... I LOVE it... tho upset my father-in-law last time cos I LOVE my cousin's pears (you'll never guess her name... Meera! pmsl... love her soooooo much too!!) but when he buys pears I don't like them... you CAN NOT beat a pear straight off the tree!! But it is very much communal... as when one is making something like pasta they will make lots then do the rounds, giving it to everyone... and an aunt does extra fine filo and will do the same, bringing it round.... Meera is also excellent at making turkish delight!! I could eat it all day!! And we are building our house and Meera's brothers are laying the tiles!! And also it;s the done thing over there that each family will build a house that is quite tall and it's split into flats... then one floor will be the 1st son, then the 2nd is the second son, ect, ect,ect... ours has 4 floors... it's nice as we're close but have our own space too... tho at the moment our floors aren't finished so we all live in the one floor.... I told my mother in law I was looking forward to sleeping in my own floor next year and she cried and fainted... when my sister in law said she was looking foward to bathing in her bathroom I warned her not to tell her mum, lol. I think the hardest part is that women waaaaaay out number the men and when there is a group of women that live together their cycles all get into sync... meaning they all get PMT at the same time, lol... And judging by the cousins in the villiage they all fall pregnant at the same time too.... so far we have 10 babies due to be born next year!!!cool!! And also every now and then it gets too much and you just NEED your own space and to be able to get away from it... as everyone has little habits that drive you mad.. like in our house there's mother-in-law trying to fatten me up the whole time, my father-in-law spoils the kids too much, my brother-in-law drinks way too much ect, ect, ect.... and just like you said earlier about tidy people annoying untidy people.... me and hubby have enough of that just the two of us.... let alone a community with quite a few people, lol. Also the communication part.... I simply CAN NOT communicate if it's something close to my heart.... Had trouble with my sister with this as she finds out after something happens and can not understand why I don't talk to her but figure things out and deal with them on my own... I know it hurts her but I find it very difficult... tho I think alot of people are like that... so maybe a community would need someone trained in getting people to communicate and express themselves? like a couseller(sp?) or something?
Frantasia comments ...
Very interesting, though I believe living in a family is living in a community - I also feel living without money, while I'd love to do it - and every good wish to you - is almost / actually impossible. For instance, I think I've read here that you have a solar powered laptop, but do you also have free Internet access? Also, I have grown children and husband and myself have used much money over the years clothing, feeding etc. and I don't know how to do this without expending money. The thing is, even if someone gives you clothes, food, whatever, unless that person has acquired them without money from someone who in turn has acquired them without money, money is still the means by which these are acquired.
Good wishes in your challenges / endeavours.
Dago comments ...
Nice topic, Mark. People tend to think too "macro" which as you said makes everyone anonymous. It's hard to think of solutions for a whole polluted city (like my hometown, Sao Paulo, Brazil). It's hard to do things alone as well. I agree with Frantasia that family can be an example of community, though when it is just about the family it can also become self-interested, like a clan. Community is, I believe, the right balance. It is an extended family, prone to difficulties, disagreements, for sure, but in a good size and intentionality (if that be the case) to work through these hardships (or even in spite of them).
There has been much confusion in what is understood as "community". If anyone would like to see a good, short explanation of the concept, read this: http://www.ic.org/pnp/myths.php
Curious about this community you mentioned in the post, Mark.
Mark comments ...
Meera - I can empathise with you about people saying things behind peoples back. That happens here the odd time, but it is also something people are learning to let go off as they can see how destructive it is. We don't do gossip here fortunately though, so you'd fit in well here! LyssaM - yeah its really good you recognise that you aren't good at communicating things close to your heart. You're not alone though, none of us are, some a bit better than others. It is difficult though but makes a huge difference to relationships when you can communicate how you feel. Frantasia - I pick up internet connection at the farm. I take your point that in this political system we use then that requires money. I don't actually need internet connection to live though. In fact my life would be a lot easier and I would spend a lot more time doing the things that make my heart sing if I didn't use computers. The only reason I use the internet anymore is to try and help people make the transition to a more gentle way of life. I really don't belief living without money is impossible - I've been doing it for 10 mths so I know its not! Also, as regards clothes, they don't need money to come into existence. The raw material come from the earth. We choose to charge each other for these materials so that we can have our security in note and paper format instead of in the format of a relationship with another person. The way we do things now is one way of doing things, but not the only way. There is a more beautiful, uplifting way, I believe. Its a very valid point but I just wanted to give you my persoective on it. Dago - great to hear from you - well if you come over to make your documentary then you will get to experience it!
Meera comments ...
It's good to hear about such a good community where sharing is the spirit, Lyssa! But I'm not from there....I'm faaaar away in India where it's not difficult to see such communities in villages. In India, the spirit of sharing lacks in towns and cities (not everywhere though) and that's where life becomes difficult. In villages, life's great, especially when you get to pass your most of the time in nature (in farming or drawing out water from well)! As regards communicating feelings to each other....I think living alone and thinking only about our own needs and wants have made us so poor communicators of feelings. While living in a community, you have just got to trust people and sometimes tell them your feelings. I don't know about you but for a frank person like me, it will be comparatively easy I think. And there's no real need for counsellers....in the beginning difficult situations are bound to occur, but gradually our own experience will guide us afterwards. Frantasia - I think the main aim is not 'not using money' but to get off a money-centered system and have a trust-and-love centered system. Mark - Thanks for that! I would like to know how it was destructive so that I can give people an example! Because people here seem to see no harm in that. I wish I could come and live in your fantastic community!
Lyssa M comments ...
Meera, it's exactly the same back home in Albania... in the cities and towns like Tirana and Durres there isn't so much community... there's more than there is here in the UK but in the villages THATS where there's the community feel... it's sooooo great... and there are often weddings when everyone comes along for the stag do/hen night which in Albania lasts for 4 days!!!! Also I've noticed that here and in Albanian cities the old people seem more likely to go senile but in the villages their minds are so sharp to the day they die... For comunicating... I'm upfront and not one to gossip so am fine in that respect but when something happens more personally I prefer to deal with it on my own... like I've misscarried several times, I found dead girl once whilst I was pregnant, things like that effect me of course and I might appear upset, or irratable but cos I don't tell people about it they don't understand why I am feeling this way and might get annoyed and then I get annoyed, ect ect ect .... so I REALLY need to work on that kind of communication. lol
Meera comments ...
Well, Lyssa, in your given example, I think it's not really your fault that you can't tell such things to others. Perhaps it's better not to make others depressed by telling about it too. It's your choice. I think the other members of the community must learn to respect whatever feeling you have got and leave it to you if you don't want to tell them. I think if I get to meet someone who was feeling sad and irritated, I would try to uplift his/her mood rather than making that person recount the event which made him/her so unhappy. It's rather foolish!
elusive butterfly comments ...
I`d love to live a more `Community` way of life.I know it prob sounds naive,but Im gonna ask anyway.Is `Commune` short for Community? or along the same lines?.. Were the Hippy Communes of yesterday working towards a similar if not the same goal as we are today here?
Im due Compensation from the Government next year for the abuse I endured by my father... Ive only just put my claim in... dont know why I waited this long... I really want to put the money to good use and not spend it on a bunch of stuff I dont need.Im not interested in material things like I used to... (I feel happier as a result)
I wish it could be possible for me to live a more holistic way of life.. (The big question `?`)
I looked up that Permaculture website and it looks really interesting.I can apply it when learnt,to my everyday life.But what I really want to find out is how to make the transition as a `whole` rather than in part in the future when Im Physically and Mentally more`ready`? How do I move out of the rat race into a community or onto a plot of land with `me mobile home and start living?! :P
I want to create a real home for my son and I away from the hustle bustle.I want to be fit and healthy,eventually Vegan and live from the land.I want to feel alive again and full of energy and hope for the future... I simply want the best for my son and I,spiritually,mentally and Physically! :)
Im currently working on getting fitter,healthier and more knowledgable on the subject of Permaculture and Im hoping that when my Compensation is ready I`ll be Physically fit `n more mentally clued up on Permaculture and ready with the help of my Compensation to put it into practise on a bigger personal level,benificial to My Son,Myself,The Human,and Animal Species and the Planet.
How did your Community come about? Where did the land come from? How did you all get together? These are the Answers I cant find anywhere?... Communities seem to be established when I discover them,unless someones not telling me something accidentally on purpose! :{ (drags leg behind her,quivers bottom lip `n uses puppy dog eyes look...) Ha! :P Seriously though,is anyone out there willing to accept a single parent and her son into their Permaculture Community at some time in the future? Im very open minded,Independant,laid back,Easy to get on with,Work well in a team & on my own,Careing,kind,shareing,Interesting (I hope!) `n quite funny... if you`ve got a warped sense of humour.:{ etc.. I also hate argueing,but will put my point across in a diplomatic way as best I can to avoid this.When I was in my early twenties before my immune system became ill I was a workaholic and worked 75 to 80 hrs per week.Im 34yrs old now.I may be older but dont think Im ready for the knackers yard just yet.With a bit of tlc and determination and self belief,I know I could Improve my health ten fold and be an asset to a Permaculture community...
I just need to find right minded people to talk to and hopefully through this site I`ll get to put my ideas and goals into practise one day soon.(fingers crossed...)
That`s basically my views and feelings on the subject at this time in my life....
Peace & Love,Jo x
comments ...
Lysa you're not alone about miscarrages, and it happens more frequently than what we think. Talking about miscarrage is tabu in our society and something secretive. I have severals early miscarrages, I didn't find proper support and I was totally misunderstood and even my husband couldn't understand my deep sorrow. Now they're buried under my fruit trees in our allotment, God bless them!(sorry but I need to acknoledge that they existed)
Respect community living, I grew up in a tiny spanish village, we knew each others well and I've got the most excellent memories, but it's not all rosie, like everybody knows everything about you good and bad, and envy is prevalent. I remember the time as student when I went to live in the city it was a kind of liberation.
Ana comments ...
sorry, the above anonymous comment is from Ana, I accidentally pressed the wrong key and I did spell check, not that matter. : )
Trix comments ...
I lived on a small island for several years and bizzarely felt more lonely in this small community because I frankly didn't fit in than I do now in a city. The difference with your community Mark is I imagine these are all people who have come together with the same intentions, does this not make it easier to feel part of the whole? Leaving (like Ana) was liberating! I would love to belong to a community like you descibe but only because the people sound like me too... So how does a community that has built up like this even start to accept people's differences? Or do these people simply feel unaccepted like I once did until they can get away? I dislike tesco milk too...
debs comments ...
I would love to live in a community! but as I am now 54 and have rhuematoid arthritis I dont think anyone would be mad enough to invite me! I am still pretty mobile and have 4 grown children.I have always lived by the rule "live simply so all may simply live" as much as I can. I have some knowledge of organic gardening and cooking.I have noticed that I have mellowed as I have aged in many ways perhaps thats why I feel that I could be unselfish enough to embark on this life!
burntsun comments ...
I live in a co-op in Bristol, UK. A co-op is a form of intentional community. We have a set of aims that individuals must agree with before they move in. Our aims are to do with living environmentally sustainably in an affordable way.
We are able to share resources collectively in a way that just wouldn't make sense individually, (as you already mention Mark) especially around food: cooking together, sharing the produce of an allotment and buying in bulk.
As I see it, it is very important that we all equal within the co-op. So we all pay the same rent, and no members have invested monetarily. Any building work done is seen to be done to improve our living environment, rather than as an "investment".
I believe this equality twinned with common aims (without the distraction of personal gain) helps us function as a group enormously.
We have issues about chores, communication, and about striking the right balance between coop/personal space. Similar to the things you've already mentioned. I think we wouldn't be human if we didn't! Sometimes it's a struggle, but when an issue is resolved it can feel very rewarding and (hope this doesn't sound like a cliche) it really feels like we've grown in our understanding.
I certainly feel like I've benefitted enormously from living in a co-op, and that I have a better tolerance for other people.
There are lots of theories about group dynamics, and it's something that might be important/useful to be skilled up on if thinking about living in a community.
I have relatives who live in Co-housing (private spaces - often mortaged/owned - with some shared facilities such as gardens and washing/cooking facilities). This seems like a sane way to live, although I imagine there isn't the close support that I find in a housing coop.
It's horses for courses really. Having different lifestyle options available at different times of one's life would be my best solution. And throw out that old inflexible idea that "the family unit is the only norm"!
Owen comments ...
Mark said: "Which means that whilst they are cooking communally together, I am off on my own cooking on the rocket stove."
Why not design and build an efficient kitchen that doesn't need bottled gas? Design the kitchen so it brings people together, encourages group participation in food prep, is energy efficient and a fun place to be.
QBR comments ...
I have lived in lots of collective households, and I can relate to how challenging, yet fulfilling it can be. Making decisions by consensus takes a lot of time, and most of us have not been raised in that sort of system so when things get heated, people tend to revert back to old habits. It takes real dedication and willingness to stay open to others to make it work, but in my experience, it is worth the effort. I consider some of the folks I used to live with siblings of a kind. We are living apart now, but we went through such intense growth together that we bonded for life.
Jackie Winterbottom comments ...
I have always wanted to live in an intentional community. It may seem odd but I feel reassured by the way you describe the problems with living full time with people. It makes sense. Lots to think about. Thank you.
Mostyn comments ...
I find this blog - about intentional communities but also about many other interesting issues - really well written and inspiring: http://communityandconsensus.blogspot.com/
A friend comments ...
http://www.ananda.org/ananda/spiritual-communities/
http://www.anandaindia.org/
You may like this, unless you have already heard of Ananda.
Best wishes...
peewit comments ...
As an Aquarian individualist I also share your humanitarian ideals, but have not live communally since my large family dispersed. I would love to have the experience of visiting communities to consider the possibility that I could live out my old age in such a one.